Something Topical

Not a steroid. Not a drink with a parasol in it, which, depending on pronunciation and reading skills, you may have supposed. What became of all the Polynesian restaurants, anyway?

Not that we could go to them now: good luck eating a Pu-Pu platter through a mask! Unless of course it was a Tiki mask, through which all things are possible. Except maybe antisepsis. What would Semmelweiss do?

That brave pioneer of medical etiquette, like his friend Joseph Lister (whence Listerine), would have had much to say about Polynesian restaurants. The sheer relief of evading another platter of English or Belgian food — also, rumor has it, Lister could put away Mai-Tais like nobody’s business. And alcohol has a sterilizing effect, you know.

And now that we’ve come full circle, sort of, take care and stay out of Polynesian restaurants till you’ve been vaccinated. Or Pasteur-ized, as we might historically source it. Or no. Your choice.

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